| Jon Jacobs | |
|---|---|
| Born | 1945 |
| Died | 2004 (aged 58–59) |
| Occupation | Writer |
Jon Jacobs (1945–2004) was a freelance writer who helped develop and define the various threads of behaviour that are today collectively known as BDSM.
He co-authored (with Gloria G. Brame and William D. Brame) the book Different Loving: An Exploration of the World of Sexual Dominance and Submission (published by Villard Books, New York, 1993. ISBN 0-679-40873-8). The book is self-described as a "breakthrough in sexual literature" and is one of the few books written by someone in the BDSM lifestyle that is commonly quoted by professionals and others on the outside of it.[1][2][3]
Jacobs was often derisive of the softer side of BDSM and was much more interested in the relationship dynamics of Total Power Exchange. In a speech in 1996 he said:
| “ | When you "submit" to or "dominate" someone in a situation where safe words are used and when limitations are negotiated, you are not actually submitting or dominating at all - you are playing at it. | ” |